Alice in Wonderland by Ben Muir from Lewis Carroll


This Play is the copyright of the Author and must NOT be Performed without the Author’s PRIOR consent

Alice In Wonderland - A Promenade Production

      The production was originally performed with five actors and three
      puppets, however, the cast can be expanded to have all characters
      played by actors

      The original casting is listed below the list of characters

      All characters can be played by either M or F actors


      White Rabbit
      Frog Footman
      The Hatter
      The Caterpillar
      The Hare
      The Dormouse
      The Cheshire Cat
      The Field Mouse
      The Queen of Hearts
      The King of Hearts

      For the original Five Cast Production the characters are split as such

      Actor gender specified in brackets

      Actor 1 (M) - Announcer/Dormouse (Puppet)
      Actor 2 (M) - White Rabbit / Cheshire Cat
      Actor 3 (F) - Frog Footman / March Hare
      Actor 4 (F) -  Caterpillar / Queen / King (puppet) / Field Mouse
      Actor 5 (M) -  Mad Hatter

      There are four separate areas needed for the promenade theatre piece
      which will be visited in the order below

      The Footmanís Door
      The Caterpillar
      The Tea Party
      The Court

      Stage directions in red italics will only apply if the production is
      being staged as a static theatrical piece otherwise there are no set
      changes as the audience will move from set to set.

      The audience gather at The Footmanís Door.
      The Door is not the way to the caterpillar, there should be another
      exit in place for the audience to get to the Caterpillar
      If the piece is a staged piece, the door can just be placed centre
      stage and when the Hatter enters and exits he can use SL and SR

      Announcer : Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, now before we start
      thereís just a few health and safety announcements we need to

      The announcer will make any relevant health and safety announces that
      apply to the promenade venue

      If done as a staged piece the announcer can give the speech regards
      turning mobile phones off etc

      As the Intro is done the white rabbit comes and stands next to the
      announcer and taps his oversized pocket watch

      Announcer :ÖÖ erÖ can I help you?

      Rabbit : Have you seen what time it is? We should have begun at the
      beginning by now and certainly be on our way to ending at the end.

      Announcer : Oh, wellÖ.

      Rabbit : Come along, come along, we havenít all day. We need to
      begin, shoo, shoo, Iíll take it from here!

      Announcer exits

      Rabbit : Oh my ears and whiskers! Do any of you know what day of the
      week it is?

      Audience response

      Rabbit : I knew it! This watch is two days slow! I knew I shouldnít
      have given it to the hatter to try and fix, he told me he was going to
      repair it with butter and he assured me that it would be best butter,
      he must have used margarine. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, I really am
      late, we must get moving. I have to deliver this this invitation to
      the hatter and the hare. Itís to play croquet with the queen. Now
      which way is the hatters? Is it this way? What about this way? Oh
      look! A door! I wonder if I should knock?

      Frog enters

      Rabbit : Oh look, Itís the Frog Footman! Maybe he knows the way!
      Excuse me?

      Frog : Hello?

      Rabbit : Excuse me. You donít know if I can get through this door do

      Frog : You could try and knock and see.

      Rabbit : That seems like a sensible idea.

      Rabbit knocks

      Rabbit : there doesnít seem to be any answer. Should I try again?

      Frog : You could.

      Rabbit knocks

      Rabbit : There still doesnít seem to be any answer, should I try

      Frog : You could.

      Rabbit knocks

      Rabbit : Thereís still no answer! Maybe itís because itís not
      loud enough. Could you help?

      Frog : I could. In fact, we could all help. When you knock, we shall
      stamp our feet and see if we can get someone to answer. After three,
      one. Two. Three!

      Everyone knocks

      Rabbit : Oh dear, my ears and whiskers, this still isnít working!
      Why is nobody answering.

      Frog : I think I know why nobody is answering the door.

      Rabbit : Why?

      Frog : Because Iím out here.

      Rabbit : What do you mean?

      Frog : Thereís no use in knocking for two reasons. Firstly because
      Iím on this side of the door and so are you. Secondly because
      youíre on this side of the door and so am I.

      Rabbit : But how are you going to answer the door if youíre out

      Frog : There might be some sense in knocking if we had a door between
      us. For instance, if you were inside, you might knock and I could
      answer it then.

      Rabbit : So if I go through, and knock, then youíll answer.

      Frog : Yes, yes, I donít see why not.

      Rabbit goes through the door and knocks.
      Frog answers

      Frog : Hello!

      Rabbit : Hello!

      Frog : Come in.

      Rabbit : Thank you. Excellent, that worked. Now I just need my friends
      to follow meÖ. Wait a moment, theyíre already here!

      Frog : Yes, they are. Theyíve always been here. Except when they
      werenít but thatís not now. Theyíre here now.

      Rabbit : But I donít want them to be here now, we need to be there now.

      Frog : I think I see what the problem was. You see, you knocked from
      that side of the door and I answered from this. Perhaps if I go on the
      other side of the door then it might work how you want.

      Rabbit : Yes, that should work. You go on that side of the door and
      then once youíre there thatís when the knocking should occur.

      Frog goes onto the other side of the door.

      Rabbit : Iím so sorry about this, we shall get this sortedÖ..

      Frog knocks

      Rabbit : Excuse me, I must get the doorÖ.

      Rabbit answers the door

      Rabbit : Hello?

      Frog : I was wondering how long I needed to be out there.

      Rabbit : Until the door got knocked on.

      Frog : Well, I knocked on the door.

      Rabbit : So you did, well youíd better come in.

      Frog : Thank you. Well Iím glad we got that sorted.

      Rabbit : Got what sorted?

      Frog : Well, you wanted them to be on the same side of the door as you
      and now they are. I told you everything would work out all right in
      the end.

      Rabbit : Iím still not sure this is how everything should have gone.
      You see if Iíd got to where I should be then I wouldnít have this
      invitation to the hatter anymore because I would have delivered it. Oh
      my ears and whiskers, what are we to do.

      Frog : We shall consider the problemÖ. I shall sit hereÖ come, sit
      down with me. We shall sit here on and off for days and days.

      Rabbit : Days and days.

      Frog : days and days and days

      Rabbit : days and days and days?

      Frog : Days and days and days and days and days

      Rabbit : Days and days and days and days andÖÖ but what am I
      supposed to do?

      Frog : Anything you like. (the frog begins to whistle)

      The rabbit looks awkward
      The Hatter enters through the door.

      Hatter : Morning!

      Frog : Morning.

      Hatter : Do you know the way to the Hareís?

      Frog : Oh, thatís quite simple. To get to the Hare you go over

      Hatter : To get to the Hare I go over there! Marvellous! Thank you.

      Hatter exits the way the Frog pointed

      Rabbit : Wait a minute! I wanted to get to the Hareís!

      Frog : Did you? I thought you just wanted to knock and for me to

      Rabbit : No, I need to deliver this invitation to the hatter and the
      hare, So I must get to the Hareís!

      Frog : Well, you should have just asked.

      Rabbit : Is that the way to the Hareís?

      Frog : Yes, but you can only go if youíre feeling Adventurous.

      Rabbit : I think weíre all feeling adventurous. Are we?

      Audience respond

      Frog : In that case can you take a letter for me?

      Rabbit : I suppose so. Who is it for?

      Frog : Itís for you, itís the letter A to remind you that youíre
      adventurous. Just in case you ever forget. Because Adventure always
      begins with an A!

      Frog gives an over sized letter A to an audience member

      Rabbit : Well, thank you for your help, weíll be off now.

      Frog : Of courseÖ.. oh and you might want to hurry up, that was the
      hatter who just went through the door.

      Rabbit : Oh my ears and whiskers!

      Frog : Less haste more speed! If you need to knock on the door again.
      Iíll be right here!

      Rabbit leads the audience towards the Hares.
      They enter the Caterpillar room.
      The Caterpillar is an elderly person sat in amongst balls and strings
      of wool, a set of knitting needles are on the caterpillars lap.
      The caterpillar is sleeping
      The rabbit brings everyone into the room and gets them to hush and sit
      In a static staged piece the Rabbit will exit and then the Footman
      will take the door with him and the Caterpillar can walk on and sit
      down, once the rabbit re-enters you can begin with the Caterpillarís
      first line rather than the Rabbitís introduction

      Rabbit : Quick, quick, we mustnít be late, but be quiet, we donít
      want to wake the caterpillar, if we do, sheíll want to have a chit
      chat and itíll all get terribly confusing and then Iíll never get
      this invitation delivered. After three, weíre all going to get up
      and tip-toe out of here. One, TwoÖÖ

      Caterpillar wakes

      Caterpillar : Oh whatís that? Whatís that! Everyone just wait a
      minute I have a question! Who are you?

      Rabbit : Oh! You woke her!

      Caterpillar : Who are you?

      Rabbit : Oh, I hardly know at present, Iím running a little late.

      Caterpillar : What do you mean by that, explain yourself.

      Rabbit : I canít explain myself, because Iím not myself you see.

      Caterpillar : I donít see.

      Rabbit : Iím afraid I canít put it more clearly. Itís very
      confusing to me.

      Caterpillar : You? Who are you?

      Rabbit : Iím the white rabbit.

      Caterpillar : Oh! Have you come to visit me!

      Rabbit : No, Iíve got to deliver an invitation.

      Caterpillar : An invitation for me?!

[end of extract]