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(MUSICAL OVERTURE COMPLETES, LIGHTS UP as the CURTAIN OPENS revealing
the large ZEPPELIN CENTER STAGE
There are a few SMALL LAND MASSES with SHRUBS and TREE PROPS on STATIONARY
WAGONS completing the setting
DOCTOR GEORGE ENTERS STAGE LEFT and CROSSES to CENTER STAGE
He is a crusty, lovable, older gentleman dressed in a baggy, but
colorful vested suit. He looks as though he would fit comfortably into
a long ago century. His ZEPPELIN, a large, cucumber shaped BALLOON,
nearly fills the UPSTAGE area. NETS and dozens of ROPES support the
GONDOLA which resembles a small SPANISH GALLEON, its BOW pointing OFF
STAGE LEFT, and with an UPPER PILOT’S DECK, STAGE RIGHT. This is
where we have the CAPTAIN’S STEERING WHEEL, CONTROL LEVERS, FLASHING
LIGHTS, ENGINE PROPELLERS, and SMOKING, SQUEAKING PIPES. DOCTOR GEORGE
is followed on from STAGE LEFT by a beautiful young in-your-face TV
reporter by the name of JUNIE MOON, who brings with her a small VIDEO
CAMERA
SEYMOUR and MAX, DOCTOR GEORGE’S first and second crew
mates, are on the ZEPPELIN, preparing for departure. They run about
making adjustments to the ROPES, MECHANISMS, etc. They are DOCTOR
GEORGE’S young dashing helpers and companions, who honor him with
their respect and faithful servitude)
JUNIE MOON
(Aggressive, news reporter attitude)
Doctor George, can I please have a word with you before you depart?
Can’t you tell me anything about this mysterious journey you’re about
to take? The public has a right to know! As a citizen of United States
of America, and as an attractive, glamorous, rookie TV newscaster, I
demand you give me a statement!
DOCTOR GEORGE
(Polite, but sternly)
I’m sorry, Miss Moon, but if I were to reveal anything to you about
this mission, then it would no longer be top secret! I am under a
classified commission by the United States Government to carry out
sensitive experiments. To tell you any more would undermine this
entire enterprise. Is everything secure, Seymour? Max?
SEYMOUR
(Dashing about, doing bits of business)
Aye, aye, Doctor, she’s ready to fly!
(Checking ENGINE PROPELLERS)
Propellers engaged and ready to crank!
(Goes to the ANCHOR)
Standing by to hoist anchor!
(MAX fiddles with DIALS and LEVERS, SMOKE and STEAM emits as CONTROL
LIGHTS FLASH)
MAX
Propane heater units are fired up and ready to go, Doctor George!
Ready when you two are!
DOCTOR GEORGE
(Delighted)
Excellent! Prepare to hoist anchor!
JUNIE MOON
Doctor George, don’t you remember Gloria Glamorude, our gossip
reporter from W.H.O.P. TV who came by to see you and got a glimpse at
that secret device of yours? It totally transformed her from a rude
reporter into a female version of Mr. Rogers! She said she’d smear
you across the airwaves if you didn’t disclose your vacation plans
or your secret weapons device.
DOCTOR GEORGE
What? Oh, yes, that insolent Gloria Glamorude—she got a peek at my
top secret invention, even though I tried to stop her! She threatened
to expose me naked before the public conscience! Imagine that! I sent
her packing!
JUNIE MOON
Yes, you did, indeed! And when she returned to W.H.O.P. TV she went on
the air talking about hearts and flowers instead of her normal
in-your-face newscaster attack persona.
DOCTOR GEORGE
(Smiling, reflecting)
Hmm…I doubt she will be bothersome to anyone ever again…ha, ha,
ha…what a relief that will be for everyone in the TV news casting
profession. Serves her right! She accused me of being a closeted
bed-wetter! Ha, ha! Nosey reporters like you and she are everywhere on
the TV and in-your-face, as you say. Ugh! Appalling! Gives me the
shudders!
JUNIE MOON
I must insist that you allow me to travel with you. The public has a
right to know, top secret or not! What did happen to my co-reporter
Gloria Glamorude, Doctor George?
DOCTOR GEORGE
No, Miss Moon, no!
JUNIE MOON
She had accused you further of being up to dirty tricks, wiretapping,
and even receiving hush money for your incredible invention!
DOCTOR GEORGE
Haven’t you heard a thing I’ve said to you? I said, “No!”
JUNIE MOON
Later, that same evening, on the 7:00 p.m. newscast at W.H.O.P. TV,
she had been transformed into a 1960’s flower child! Her
iconoclastic image as a hard-nosed-in-your-face-newswoman had been
totally ruined!
DOCTOR GEORGE
(Annoyed)
Enough of this in-your-face bunk! Miss Moon, really, have you news
people no scruples? If I were to reveal more than is generally known,
then the safety of my dedicated crew and I would be in serious
jeopardy.
(SEYMOUR and MAX show off for JUNIE MOON as she aims her VIDEO CAMERA
at them. They make muscles and pose, etc.)
JUNIE MOON
Your crew members are quite entertaining.
(DOCTOR GEORGE glares at them and they return to duty)
Might I have a word with them?
DOCTOR GEORGE
Most emphatically not! Max! Seymour! Prepare for the ascent! The idea!
Horsing around for the TV camera. To your posts! Miss Moon, do not
attempt to board this vessel!
(DOCTOR GEORGE charges up the GANGPLANK CENTER STAGE and positions
himself on the PILOT’S BRIDGE. MAX takes the CAPTAIN’S WHEEL as
SEYMOUR loosens the MOORING ROPES. JUNIE MOON sneaks ONBOARD and
approaches SEYMOUR near the GANGPLANK)
JUNIE MOON
Are you Mister Seymour?
SEYMOUR
(Impressed at being recognized by such a beauty)
Yes, Ma’am. Gosh, you sure are such a pretty lady! Am I going to be
on TV? I’ve always wanted to be a TV person who’s appearing with
the beautifully rich and famous, celebrity TV people.
JUNIE MOON
Well, thank you for the compliment, Seymour. My name is Junie Moon.
I’m a rookie TV newscaster intent on clawing my way to the top of
the TV news business. And glamour does have its advantages.
(JUNIE MOON indicates the BEAUTY SPOT on her right cheek and bats her
eyes at SEYMOUR seductively)
MAX
(Observing)
Behave yourself, Seymour
JUNIE MOON
I didn’t earn this beauty spot on my cheek by schlepping around the
TV studio getting hoots and whistles from the studio crew!
SEYMOUR
(Admiring the BEAUTY SPOT)
Hubba, hubba, girl, an actual beauty spot, just like Liz Taylor’s!
Now I’m twice as attracted to you as before!
JUNIE MOON
(Enjoying the compliment, demure)
Yes, yes, it’s all a part of the game, sweetie—and it helps me get
my stories when people are attracted to me.
(Calculating)
Yes, Seymour, dear, you will be on TV, but only if you can tell me
about this mission of Doctor George’s that’s about to begin.
(Checking before speaking, SEYMOUR looks around secretively)
SEYMOUR
(Intimately)
Gee, uh…Junie Moon…I like your name—but Doctor George swore me
to secrecy. I can tell you, however, that we are going to be traveling
halfway around the world!
JUNIE MOON
You must be very brave.
SEYMOUR
(Blushing)
Oh, yes, ma’am, thank you ma’am—Miss—Ms. Junie Moon…On the
Isle of Jaggar we hope to—oops—it just slipped out….
JUNIE MOON
(With VIDEO CAMERA poised and ready)
The Isle of Jaggar? Oh! You mean Jaggar’s Isle! Uh huh, go on, you
were saying?
SEYMOUR
(Feeling awkward, worried)
Golly, please don’t tell anyone I told you where we’re headed or
Doctor George will skin me alive! See you later TV lady, Miss…Ms.
Junie Moon. I wish we could take you with us but it’s much too
dangerous. Now get off our zeppelin because I have to hoist up the
gangplank. Hurry, before Doctor George notices you!
(She charges quickly off the vessel, then boldly turns around at the
bottom)
JUNIE MOON
I live for danger, Mr. Seymour!
(SEYMOUR has begun his readiness duties, pulling, and checking ROPES,
etc. He ignores her and JUNIE MOON turns away from him in
frustration)
DOCTOR GEORGE
Is everything secure, men?
JUNIE MOON
(Talking to herself)
I simply can’t miss out on an opportunity to document this
adventure. It could change the world, and there might even be a
promotion in it for me! A stepping stone to superstardom!
(JUNIE MOON sneaks back ONBOARD before SEYMOUR has a chance to pull in
the PLANK. She hides inside a large PICKLE BARREL, LEFT OF CENTER
pulling it closed with a short ROPE attached to the underside of the
LID. It is near some CRATES which the characters can leap upon from
time to time in order to pontificate)
DOCTOR GEORGE
Seymour! Haven’t you hoisted the anchor yet? Max and I are
impatiently waiting!
(SEYMOUR pulls in the GANGPLANK)
SEYMOUR
Sorry, Sir, I’d forgotten to pull in the plank first—and then
comes the anchor.
(Hoisting the ANCHOR)
I’ve got it now, Sir! Ready for lift-off!
[end of extract]
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